Blanket of Rules

We watched a somewhat scary movie last night, and as I climbed into bed I was reminded of when I was scared as a child and hid my feet under the blankets. [I may or may not have done that last night too…] It was a defensive move meant to protect myself from the ‘bad guys’, whatever they happened to be. 

As a kid I would lie there and add ‘rules’ to the safety of my bed, such as: I couldn’t stick my toes out (or fingertips or hands) or ‘they’ were allowed to grab them. Actually anything sticking out was fair game, so I always ended up completely covered by blankets, sweating because my hot breath collected over my face, and suffering with a full bladder because, if my head couldn’t stick out, I CERTAINLY couldn’t get out of my safe place to go to the bathroom without ‘them’ getting me. 

And as I would lie there, I would imagine all sorts of crazy/scary things happening outside my protective blanket cover. Dolls coming to life and hovering over my bed with knives, creepy things crawling out from under the bed waiting for me to slip up and stick out a toe so they could grab me, things lining the hallway to the bathroom in silence, hoping I would get brave and get out of bed. And I would lie there like that until I wasn’t scared anymore, or until it was morning and the sun made me brave again. 

I got to thinking as I lay there last night that now, as an adult, I do the same thing in other areas of my life. I put these layers of rules over myself like a protective blanket because of past experiences that have scared or hurt me. 

And while I’m hiding under my ‘blanket of rules’, I’m imagining all sorts of things going on outside it that are meant to hurt me. My imagination goes crazy because I can’t clearly see anything, and I am figuring the worst in others.

And while the ‘blanket of rules’ I’ve established are intended to protect me, what they really do is stifle, suffocate, and paralyze me. They keep people away, make me uncomfortable, and keep me from seeing what is real and true. 

Psalm 27 is a great encouragement to me! The Lord is my light and salvation- whom should I fear? When the Lord hides me, He sets me on a rock so I can clearly see how He is working through situations. He reminds me to seek His face, and when I do, I am reminded not to let my imagination take over, but to trust in Him. And then I don’t need to hide myself, because I am hidden in Him. The Son makes me brave because He will help me!

Psalm 27:11-14 Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies. (12) Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty. (13) I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. (14) Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.